Filipinos are really unique. Our taste in clothes, our hospitality, our ability to laugh when someone falls down a flight of stairs or slips on a wet sidewalk while trying to help the person at the same time make us distinct from our Asian counterparts. Our modes of transportation, of course, do not escape the Filipinos’ penchant for things outlandish. The jeepney has long been one of the stamps of a Pinoy. Modern times, aggravated by traffic jams and the soaring gas prices, have given birth to another Pinoy oddity – the MRT culture.

Have you ever tried riding the MRT on an early weekday morning or during rush hours after offices close shop for the day? For those who are stuck everyday in traffic busily honking your horns or singing yourselves deaf out of boredom, if not having an animated conversation with Mr. Fu over at Energy FM, I recommend that you try the MRT for a week. One ride is not enough! On that point, I’m not even sure if one week is enough. You have to immerse yourself in that boiling pot of cleverly hidden nudges and kicks amidst acerbic faces of creatures besting each other for a minute space in a jampacked cart. Of course, I will leave you with a few tips before you embark on your adventure.

The best tip I’ve received when I started riding the MRT was to take the “roundtrip.” This is the process where you ride the train going the opposite direction where you’re headed. Once it reaches the end point (either North Edsa or Taft), you may now sit comfortably while you watch other people fight over every inch available to fit themselves into. It takes almost double the normal time to reach your destination. However, escaping the hassle of sucking your stomach in to fit into a miniscule space that only you can seem to imagine existing – double the normal time is well worth it.

But then one of the reasons people take the MRT is because it’s fast. Let’s face it. Forty minutes in EDSA would amount to just about twenty minutes in the train. So when you do not have the luxury to take the roundtrip, listen to some strategies I’ve noticed quite a number of people do to get in the crowded train.

Instead of staying behind the yellow tiles which mark the danger zone, people edge each other back even at the cost of breaking their necks. For example, A is standing alone at the designated spot on the platform. B suddenly appears and stands on A’s right side. C then stands on A’s left side. When D comes along and sees that he cannot fit himself anymore on the designated spot without standing behind someone, he’d stand slightly in front of B or C, even if he’s already stepping on the danger zone. The security guard will whistle as a warning, in which instance D will step back and force whoever is beside him to step back. He thus takes the spot occupied by the one who was on the platform first.

Another tactic… D stands behind the three guys who were there first. When the train doors open and the three guys in front stand back to let people from inside the train alight, D suddenly moves in and squishes himself in between the throng; thus, eliminating the efforts of the people already inside the train to become contortionists to let other people get out first.

I remember two ladies who had a child with them. The train was so full and they should not try to get in anymore as the child would definitely be buried. What they did was to push the child first and let the other people’s conscience take over so as to let them in as well. But I am not recommending you do this. Those ladies should have been dragged to the land of ethics and morality.

Of course, it would be better if you’d be able to develop a strategy of your own – one that would better suit your body type. And don’t forget that the purpose of this exercise – riding the MRT – is to build your Filipino character. How? Well, horrible as the MRT experience may sound, there would always be the kind faces empathizing and laughing with you as all of you start sucking in your stomachs while the train door squishes everyone in place for another five minutes before the train reaches its next destination. The challenge of being Pinoy is to be that smiling face when others turn to their frowns.